4. Types of players
As the types of relations the types of BDSM players are equally important for kind of and method of training. The combination of type of relationship on one hand and type of players on the other hand is determining for the level of submission. This level of submission determines which type of training will be the most effective and most likely to be successful.
There are lots of ways in which you can classify types of BDSM players. I limit myself here to just two types of Dom and two types of sub. What I describe are the extreme types on the scale; there are lots of varieties in between.
A. The service oriented sub
This is the sub with the highest level of submission. She has hardly any direct pleasure from the game. Her goal in the game is to do her best to please her Dom as much as possible. The sweeter and more submissive she will be, the more pleased her Dom will be. This utmost of pleasure for her Dom is what gets her the kick.
Some of these subs might have trouble taking pain, but they can stand it for it pleases her Dom. There is a high level of admiration or devotion – or love if you want – for their Dom. This doesn’t have to be a romantic type of love. They are just prepared to do (almost) anything to please their Dom.
This strong submissive attitude makes it possible to use the same kind of training you would use for an animal. Animal type training could be a very effective method. Rewards can be small (as long as the Dom shows he is pleased) and even ‘not correcting’ will be seen by the sub as a reward.
B. The ego oriented sub
The pure masochist is a good example of this type. They only reason she is prepared to please her Dom is to motivate him to play with her. She doesn’t get pleasure from serving her Dom but out of the play itself. The true masochist wants to experience pain and that gives her all the pleasure she needs. Whether her Dom has a good time as well is not that important to her.
It seems like an egoistic idea, but it isn’t more egoistic than the other type. For both types the fact is – as it should in a play – that they enjoy it. The one type directly and the other type indirectly for her Dom enjoys the game.
This type of sub is less submissive and can be trained easier by giving her strong rewards. ‘Not getting a correction’ will rarely be seen as a reward.
C. The service oriented Dom
The service oriented Dom searched a who likes to please her Dom. Such a Dom searches for those types of play in BDSM of which he knows it will arouse his sub. He will get turned on from the fact that she gets excited during play.
She wants something – let’s say pain – very bad and he gets excited being in the situation where he may dish it out. Just as with the service oriented sub, this Dom will have some sort of adoration (or even devotion) of his sub. His ego will be boosted if his sub performs well and makes him proud. He will show her around and the credits she gets for her performance will shine off on him.
Such a Dom believes in rewarding good behaviour but might have trouble correcting bad behaviour. He has a tendency of finding excuses for wrong behaviour she’s displaying.
D. The ego oriented Dom
The pure sadist is a good example of this Dom. He will take good care of his sub, no doubt; she is his most precious possession; but during play he’s mainly concerned about his own pleasure. If his sub enjoys her self as well, that’s fine but it is certainly not his main goal.
He will respect her limits, but if that means that he cannot enjoy himself from the play, there is nothing else where he can get his pleasure. This will mean that he will loose interest in playing at all.
He loves his sub, for he needs her to get his pleasure, but there is no such thing as adoration of devotion.
This type of Dom really enjoys the correction wrong behaviour. He has a tendency to (like a policeman) search for wrong behaviour and often forgets to reward the right behaviour. He will have trouble to get results out of training, unless she’s a service oriented sub.
Like said most Dominants and subs are somewhere between these two extremes. The pure sadist can only achieve results in training with the pure masochist.